I am not saying my neighbor watches for nap time. I am saying the pattern is getting suspicious.
My baby finally goes down around one. At 1:07, his mower starts. Not just mowing either. Edging, blowing, trimming one bush for twenty minutes like he is filming a landscaping documentary.
We are in a little subdivision outside Fort Worth. The yards are not estates. You could mow his whole property during one commercial break.
I mentioned the nap schedule once and he said daytime is when yard work happens. Fair. I know the world does not stop because I had a baby.
But yesterday he mowed a strip he already mowed two days ago. One strip. Right beside our fence.
Am I sleep deprived and paranoid, or is this man beefing with an eight month old?
Ask him directly but nice. ‘Hey, are we beefing or do you just really love that strip of grass?’ Make him say it out loud.
Come live by me. Roosters, tractors, dogs, chainsaws. That baby will sleep through the apocalypse by August.
Put a white noise machine by the baby’s door and stop giving this man free space in your head. Not saying you’re wrong. Saying sleep deprivation will have you building a case file.
Could be he only has that window in his schedule. The re-mowed strip is weird though. Like sir what crop are you harvesting.
My neighbor used to leaf blow at 6:45 every Saturday. I started vacuuming against our shared wall when his football game came on. We reached peace through mutually assured annoyance.
Daytime is legal mowing time. Babies nap at all different hours. You cannot expect the whole street to coordinate around one household.
Girl he knows. I don’t care what anybody says. One strip by the fence is a declaration of war.